Thoughts On Kids, Kids, and More Kids

I don’t know what it is, but God has something to teach me through children. This has been made clear to me because I have never been a fan of kids, but my last two jobs and now one of my main responsibilities here at the YWAM base during the EDL (leadership school) is to work directly with kids for hours on end. The longer time goes on, the easier it gets for me, but by the end of the day, I am still not excited about booger covered hands that like to play in the trash and eat anything on the floor. Pretty sure that if adults acted the same way, I wouldn’t be excited about them either…but thankfully I only know a few like that ;)

I also don’t know what the Lord is trying to show me through this time of basically mourning the life I had in Minnesota. I loved my house, I loved my roommate, I loved the kids at my job (because they were a good time, not because they were children - let’s not get carried away here), I loved making money and feeling like I earned the little rewards I gave myself for working hard – like Taco Bell after an exhausting day, or the satisfaction of cleaning my kitchen. Now I obviously have no Taco Bell, and cleaning the kitchen here only lasts so long because there are so many hundreds of ants everywhere in the base (and Iquitos), that a counter only stays ant-free for a matter of minutes. It’s been really hard for me to miss those luxuries, and has made the transition here a bit difficult.

But what I do know… God tells us to love and be like children. The more time I spend with them, the more I re-learn how to play. I haven’t been very good at that until the last year or so. I still don’t really feel super comfortable playing with kids, but I’m at least able to take my life a little less seriously and have some fun when it’s needed. I’m also daily reminded of how we are supposed to have faith like children:

Matthew 18:3-5

3 And he said:“Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. 4 Therefore, whoever takes the lowly position of this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. 5 And whoever welcomes one such child in my name welcomes me.

We are supposed to have faith that our Heavenly Father is always there to take care of us when we fall down and get a scrape, or to sort things out when we feel like somebody else is being unfair to us. Can you tell that I’ve been working with toddlers the last few weeks?

These little ones are also so attached to their parents, that the first two weeks, every single morning and afternoon when their parents would leave for class, we would have 4+ screaming, sobbing kids who could not be consoled in any way. What if my desire for my Heavenly Father were that strong? What if I just could not stand to be outside of His presence, or knowing that He’s nearby? What if I actually trusted that if I went to Him with absolutely any problem in the world, He would do His best to fix it and take care of me? What if I trusted that He actually knows how to do this life thing better than I do?

I know that I’m here for a very special reason. I do trust that He has a plan for me. But here I am, pouting like one of these toddlers that I can’t have my mediocre life at home, when He’s offering me life abundant. So I’m here now sharing my thoughts and questions with you guys, and asking that you pray for my heart to be more open to His fatherly love, and would trust the way Jesus taught us to.

These are 3 of the 7 kids that I work with every day! Moises, Elisabeth, and Alex.